Supporting someone on their end of life journey

It is such a privilege to be invited into someone’s end of life care. To offer the opportunity for reflection, to help get paperwork in order, to create a space that for the journey deep within. Living with a life-limiting diagnosis carries a heavy weight. The person can find themselves altered through pain. They see characteristics in themselves that they do not like.  Intolerance, impatience, reduced levels of empathy for other people’s day-to-day ailments start to creep in. Their level of independence declines resulting in greater reliance on care-givers. And all the time they grieve the loss of the person they once were.

Legislation for Voluntary Assisted Dying

In Ireland the Voluntary Assisted Dying Bill 2024 was passed in The Dáil but much work must be done for this to become law. In the meantime, those living with pain &/or a life-limiting diagnosis cannot make a legal choice to end their own suffering in a safe, compassionate and dignified way in this country. The debate is complex and we must respect all points of view.

A letter to show your support for Voluntary Assisted Dying

Here is a sample letter you can send to your representative

Or use the template below. Copy and paste into a Google/Word doc or into the body of an email. Main thing is offer your support through action.

Your Name
123 Your Street
Your City, ST 12345
(123) 456-7890
no_reply@example.com

Date Month Year

Name of Representative/TD
Address of constituency clinic

Dear Name of TD/Representative,

I am writing to express my support for the Voluntary Assisted Dying Bill 2024 and changes to legislation necessary to bring the Bill into law. This would give individuals the statutory right and personal autonomy to make the decision to end their suffering.

I support voluntary assisted dying as a compassionate choice for those suffering immense pain or living with an incurable life-limiting condition. Living on those terms limits independence, dignity and personal autonomy and I support the assistance of a person to die in accordance with their wishes as  expressed in a previously agreed end of life plan.   

I value the support you can offer in your position as my local representative to progress this legislation.

Sincerely,

Your Name

Other ways to offer support

Letters or emails are not for everyone. You may prefer to be an indirect supporter by arranging a fundraising event.  Monies could go to organisations offering care in the home, hospice care etc. Or perhaps you could donate to Dignity in Dying, End of Life Ireland. You can also donate to organisations providing supports for specific life-limiting conditions such as MND.

Care with Compassion

How can we care with compassion? Talking with someone who you love about their death can simply be too much – for both parties. However, having the opportunity to reflect on your life is a true gift and in my view a necessary flagstone on the end of life path. If you cannot be that flagstone for a loved one because of the pain, perhaps you can engage the services of a skilled helper to do this. I offered this support to someone in my community. She said she always felt in safe hands as we prepared letters to loved ones, prepared her Celebration of Life Ceremony and much more. I would welcome with grace the opportunity of being the safe hands for you on your end of life path. I call this support Death Talks. Because the more we are comfortable talking about death, the more we can support those on their death journey. You can read more about my support here